The Three Crucial Elements to Apologizing

May 05

Learning how to apologize is a critical skill that many of us never properly learn. Sure, we might be able to say, “I’m sorry,” but the aspect of the apology that matters most is telling the other person that you truly understand their feelings and the impact that your words or actions had on them. […]

Love Beyond Chocolate on Valentine’s Day

Feb 14

Valentine’s Day…love or hate the holiday, it’s a time to ponder love. Many millions of people celebrate Valentine’s Day across the globe, exchanging material tokens of affection. Imagine if we went beyond the chocolate, beyond the cards, and truly celebrated the verb of love.   What if each of us looked deeply at the ways […]

Remembering Those We Lost This Holiday

Nov 27

None of us are getting out of this life alive. We all have to face loss, and holidays can either be a painful time of remembering those we lost, or a time of gratitude for the time we were given, or a combination of both.   Sadly, over the last few months, we have lost […]

How to Make an Apology in Time for Dan Savage’s Hump Fest

Oct 28

I’m a die hard Dan Savage fan. When I heard that Hump Fest (Savage’s curated amateur porn film festival) was coming to Colorado, I bought tickets that day. When I told my partner I had purchased tickets for us, he broke the news that he was out of town that weekend.   I was disappointed, […]

Writing and Relationships: Seven Reminders to Live By

Jul 09

A professor once told me that mastery requires a minimum of ten years of consistent and committed focus on a craft or a subject. We don’t normally think of a relationship in terms of “mastering” another person, but the same rules apply to learning another person and learning a craft such as writing. Both demand […]

What Vulnerability in Relationship Looks Like

Feb 13

Thanks to Brene Brown’s TED Talk, many of us understand vulnerability as one of the necessary keys to unlock true connection in relationship.   As I write, I realize that vulnerability is the place where I continue to get stuck in relationship, often succumbing to my instinctual desires to shut down, run away, or, if […]

The Biggest Relationship Saboteur: Ourself

Jan 30

Many of us (myself included in the form of talking to couples around the globe) are searching for the answer to making a relationship work. We want that golden nugget of advice that lives outside of ourselves, the secret to happily ever after. What if the secret lies within us, behind our eyes and in […]